Even if my status wasn’t so public, whenever I go out with someone, I make sure that my date knows that I am HIV-positive early on.Disclosing my status sooner rather than later is something I do—not because I plan on sleeping with them right away (of course, if I did that would be OK too)—but because I don’t want either of us to get too invested unless we both know what we’re getting into.On some LGBTQ dating sites, there is an option to check a box if you’re HIV-positive.After talking to a few people who use those sites, I realized a lot of people don’t feel comfortable disclosing that way. Sometimes I want my status to be the first thing I bring up, like I’m wearing it on a shirt.Because of that, it is nearly impossible for me to give anyone the virus. When it comes to sleeping with someone, I expect both of us to be honest with each other.I think people have this misconception that it is only an HIV-positive person’s responsibility to have their health in check. I would expect my partner to be tested for everything and for us to be open with each other.I’m been publicly open about my status since I was 21.
I had the normal first-date jitters, plus this feeling that somehow he would know I am HIV-positive.I was not ready to trust a teenage boy with that information.I wondered what would happen if the whole city found out.You see, the problem with dating guys my age is that instead of a date, our dinners often morph into an HIV/AIDS Q&A session once they learn my status.The teacher-student situation doesn’t really leave room for romance.